


The Full Severity of Mercy

by elrhiarhodan



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Grief, Harry's a bit of an ass but that's nothing new, Mourning, No comfort Here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-25
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 17:03:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10995195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elrhiarhodan/pseuds/elrhiarhodan
Summary: In the aftermath of the Speed Force catastrophe, Harry and Tracy have a difficult conversation.  The one that Harry has shortly after with Cisco is even more difficult.





	The Full Severity of Mercy

**Author's Note:**

> **Spoilery notes are spoilery** : A tag for some post-finale feels. Like so many, I wasn't a fan of HR for much of the season - not because he wasn't a scientist or a warrior - but because he didn't seem to have a purpose. His backstory was always obscured and I feel very cheated that we'll never really know what happened to him, or really all that much about him. And I grieve that the man will never the get happy, rich and fulfilled life that he truly deserves. The jury's out on Tracy and I honestly hope she's not being set up as a romantic interest for Harry, not because I don't want Harry to have some companionship, but I deeply resent the idea that one doppelganger is just as good (and acceptable) as another.
> 
> Title from a Yehuda Amichai poem: 
> 
>  
> 
> _Count them. Be present, for they  
>  have already used up all the blood and there's still not enough,  
> as in a dangerous operation, when one  
> is exhausted and beaten like ten thousand. For who is  
> the judge, and what is the judgment,  
> unless it be in the full sense of the night  
> and in the full severity of mercy._

Harry feels her eyes on him as he works his way through the diagrams on one of the dozen marker boards in the room. It's unnerving and it forces him into making a comment. "Your science is … sound."

"That sounds like I'm being damned with faint praise." The woman – Brand – laughs. It's a bitter, sad sound. "Besides, it didn't work. Savitar … " Brand cuts herself off, choking on her grief.

"It would have, if you'd accounted for the effects of the crystalline Speed Force vessel." There's no way he's called it the _Philosopher's Stone_. "Fix this and this and this, and it should work just fine." Harry writes down a few calculations, points out where the adjustments would need to be made, caps the marker and drops it in the tray. "It's …actually kind of brilliant." He's not a man accustomed to doling out praise, but that is the absolute truth. "How long did this take to create?"

"About three weeks." Brand sighs.

"Even more impressive." Harry still doesn't turn around. He spots another small error. "This equation needs a bit of refinement." The only sound in the room is the squeak of the marker against the board.

At least until Brand picks up an eraser and starts wiping it clean.

"Hey – "

"None of this matters. It's over. It's done. The monster has ceased to exist. There's no need for this anymore."

Harry wants to tell the woman that there will always be more monsters, more horrors, more … "I'm sorry. I know how much he meant to you."

"Do you, really?" Brand walks around the board and Harry finally sees her face. "Do you have any idea what type of man HR really was?"

Harry's got enough sense to know that saying _"Yes, a moron"_ is probably the wrong thing to say. "He was an … interesting man."

"You probably thought he was an idiot. He wasn't a scientist or a great tactician - like you're supposed to be."

Harry shrugs and wonders what the team has told this woman about him. "The thought had crossed my mind."

"He wasn't like us – he didn't understand any of this." Brand waves the eraser at the boards, at the workbench. "But he understood the human soul. He understood how important it was to make the human connection, to give everyone the chance to be the best they could be."

Harry had heard plenty from Jesse about HR, how kind and funny and sweet he'd been to her when he didn't have to be. When Harry had brushed that off, Jesse had given him a look that all but screamed, _He's so not you_. It had been mean and petty, but Harry had felt a touch threatened by his daughter's affection for that strange and cheerful idiot. Wallace also had only good things to say about the man who'd mentored him. 

And while there hadn't been any sort of competition between them - how could there have been - the Earth-19 Wells had sacrificed his life to save someone who was little more than a stranger. That's kind of hard to beat. 

Harry shakes his head, feeling more than a little diminished. "I couldn't have done what he did."

"No, I don't expect you would have." There's a healthy dose of contempt in Brand's voice. "Not just exchanging places with Iris and dying – but everything else. You are not the kind of person who inspires people to greatness. You probably work through and fear and anger and contempt."

Harry has to laugh. "You've been talking to Ramon?"

Brand blinks, taken aback by his amusement at her insults.

"I'm definitely not anyone whose words can inspire people to be their best. But …" Harry shakes his head, dismissing an idea before it fully forms. It would probably be a terrible mistake.

"But – what?"

Harry looks at Brand and really sees her. Sees a face worn down by grief and pain, sees a spark dimmed – but not snuffed out. "My S.T.A.R. Labs isn't quite like this." He gestures to the piles of rubble and broken tech that still needs to be removed. Between Savitar's attack and the Speed Force raining holy hell on Central City, there is going to be a lot of work to do to bring this place back to operational levels. "It's a well-functioning, highly profitable research facility doing cutting edge work on projects like this." 

"What are you saying?"

"I've already said, your science is sound, and your work on this containment device – ."

"The Speed Force Bazooka."

"Stupid name."

Brand glares at him but Harry refuses to get off track. "Whatever. It is exceptional."

That seems to stun her. "Um, thank you."

Harry waves that off. "No gratitude necessary. What I'm trying to say is that if you want, there's a place for you at my S.T.A.R. Labs."

"On another Earth? A different dimension?"

Harry tries not to let his irritation show at these obvious questions. "Yes."

"Won't that be a problem?"

"What do you mean?" Harry feels like he's lost the thread of the conversation.

"What about my doppelganger? I do have a doppelganger, right?"

Harry scratches the back of his neck, feeling more than a little uncomfortable. "Yes, well. She's … "

Brand is by no means stupid. "She's dead, isn't she?"

"Yeah, well, sorry about that." Harry wishes he never started this conversation. He turns his back on Brand and starts fiddling with the tools on the workbench. 

But Brand isn't leaving it alone. "You know this, how?"

"When Joe and Iris came over, they told me a little bit about the plan. Mentioned your name. I was curious."

"So you looked me up? What happened to me?"

"Not you – you are here, you are a product of this dimension. Don't start making the mistake of conflating yourself with your Earth-2 counterpart." Harry hates referring to his Earth as that, but Garrick – the real Garrick – had been pretty clear that Harry's Earth was one step removed from the prime.

"My doppelganger, then. What happened to her?"

Harry doesn't believe in sugar coating anything. "She was affected by the Particle Accelerator accident on my Earth."

"She was a meta-human?" 

"Yeah."

"And she's dead - how did that happen."

Harry runs a head through his hair and pulls off his glasses. Brand's lips quiver and he remembers that HR hadn't needed or worn eyeglasses, so he puts them back on. "She wasn't a particularly benign meta. She'd worked with Zoom."

"Zoom - as in the monster that terrorized Central City last year?"

Harry nods. "He was from my Earth originally. He also had a habit of killing his lieutenants. Your doppelganger had some interesting powers and Zoom found them useful. For a while. Until he killed her."

"What powers? What were my - my doppelganger's - powers?"

"She like to burn things. Could make almost anything burn down to ash with a touch. The opposite of Killer Frost, actually. Although FireBrand couldn't throw fire."

"FireBrand? You're kidding me. You have _got_ to be kidding me."

"Nope." Harry is enjoying himself.

"But if I go to your Earth, work in your S.T.A.R. Labs, won't people think I'm this 'FireBrand' meta? That she didn't really die?"

Harry connects his watch to one of the few operational monitors in the room and tosses the data to it. "Look."

The monitor displays an image of a rather handsome woman in a bright red and orange leather suit, a mask over her face - not that dissimilar to Jesse's, come to think of it - and her hair a wild mass of untamed curls that matched the color of her costume. "Believe me, no one would confuse you this one." 

"So, you said Zoom killed her. How? Why?"

Harry shrugs. "Zoom was a sociopathic monster who liked to kill people. There was rarely a reason for it. About a year before she died, FireBrand was seen working with Zoom to destroy a police precinct. The police found her body in the river with a hole punched through her chest. Typical Zoom execution style."

Brand looks like she was about to puke and Harry kicked a waste basket in her direction. Perhaps he shouldn't have been so blunt.

But Brand doesn't boot her lunch. She just gives him a hard, bitter look. "Would I be working for you?"

"Well, everyone at S.T.A.R. Labs works for me. I own the place."

"No, what I'm asking is will I need to see you day in and day out?"

 _Ah._ "Actually no. I'm staying here, on this Earth, for the foreseeable future. I'm needed here."

"That's good to know. I don't think I could bear looking at your face day in and day out. Hearing your voice. Seeing you and knowing you're not him."

Harry gets that. He knows all about grief and pain. "Well, will you go?"

"I need to think about it." At that, Brand sweeps out of the room with a strange sort of majesty, leaving an even stranger kind of vacuum in her absence.

Harry picks up a bit of tech that had fallen from a shelf, realizes it's only partially broken and puts in in the to-be-salvaged pile. That will be something to look forward to during the long, empty nights here. He has to laugh - he's just signed up for another indefinite stay in Casa S.T.A.R. Labs, although perhaps he can get his hands on that light refraction technology that HR had brought over and used so effectively. Tech like that is worth exploring and exploiting. 

It might just be useful if he ever wanted to leave this facility and not get shot again.

"What's so funny?" Cisco's leaning against the doorframe, all nascent power and bad temper. What else is new.

"Nothing important, just laughing at myself."

"Huh, I never found you all that amusing."

"Cute, Ramon." This feels good and right and normal, the banter with someone who can take everything that Harry can dish out.

Cisco helps him sort through the mess of gear and they work companionably for a while. In blessed silence, which is unusual for Cisco.

And naturally, the silence doesn't last. 

"Saw Tracy before I came in."

"Tracy?"

"Tracy Brand."

"Ah, right - forgot her first name."

Cisco picks up one of the micro-power units, frowns at it and tosses it into the recycling pile before saying, "She asked me about your S.T.A.R. Labs. Said you offered her a job."

"I did. I may be a dick, but I can still spot talent." Harry points to the boards still scattered around the room. "That's genius. I don't think I would have come up with that - at least not so quickly."

"It was brilliant. Still is."

"Where is it - the weapon?"

"We had to give the power supply back to ARGUS, and the gun's useless without it. It's in my lab for now." Cisco sounds a bit regretful.

"Well, maybe I can work on an alternate power source." Harry likes the idea of that. It would be a nice challenge to take on. And maybe a way to get Barry out of the Speed Force without it raining disaster on this world. He doesn't say anything about that to Cisco. He doesn't want to give him false hope.

"I don't think we'll need a Speed Force Bazooka again anytime soon."

"You never know what weapon you'll need until you need it." It might be difficult to keep to that plan.

Cisco takes refuge in snark. "Very profound, Obi-Wan."

Harry laughs at the reference. "By the way, I am not going to call it a 'Speed Force Bazooka'. Your naming powers have definitely gone down hill." Harry carefully places a latticed crystal power inverter in the to-be-saved pile.

"I didn't name it. HR did."

"Figures." Harry shakes his head. "How the hell did you put up with him for so long."

"He wasn't you."

Harry looks up. Cisco is thoughtful, there's a sadness in him that Harry doesn't recognize. "Obviously."

Cisco shakes his head. "No - you don't get it. He wasn't _you_. He was the anti-you. He was sweet and kind and all he'd wanted to do was inspire people, to make people happy." Cisco voice breaks slightly. "He always thought he was outclassed here, out of his league, out of his depth - a drag on the team. But he wasn't. This has been a very dark and terrible year, Harry. For all of us, but HR was always there, with a smile, a quip, a bit of encouragement. Yeah, he was annoying at times, but he stood up and was there when it counted. He always mattered. He'll always matter. He was pretty much the best damn thing that happened to us this whole damn year." 

"You cared for him."

"Yeah, a lot." Ramon bites his lip, and he looks like he's about to cry. 

"I'm sorry I didn't have the chance to really get to know him."

"You had that chance. You spat into his coffee. You were an asshole to him."

Harry remembers the man's reaction - momentary dismay and then a smile. He feels a tide of shame burn on his cheeks. It's as unwelcome as it's unfamiliar.

"But you can't turn back time. Or well, at least you shouldn't." Cisco laughs at that. The sound isn't nice.

Silence returns, but it's not alone; tension is a close companion.

Unnerved, Harry asks Cisco, "So, what did you tell Brand? Tracy?"

"About what?"

"About working at my S.T.A.R. Labs?"

Cisco smiles. "I told her she should grab the opportunity with both hands and never let go."

"Really?" Harry's surprised, given Ramon's earlier animosity.

"I'd give my left nut to work there."

"Huh. Didn't know that. Why didn't you ask to come back with me? Why stay here?" There had been plenty of times this past year when he'd wished he had Cisco Ramon working for him. 

Cisco shakes his head. "You never get it, do you?"

"Get what?"

"We're family here. We need each other. We might fuck up and do stupid shit that hurts our family, but we're still family. Going to work for you in your shiny palace isn't going to mean squat when my family needs me here. Get it?"

"Yeah, Ramon, I do."

__

FIN

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to follow me at my tumblr [Obscene Circus Ponies](http://elrhiarhodan.tumblr.com/), and on my old school (and much beloved) [Dreamwidth](https://elrhiarhodan.dreamwidth.org/) account.


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